Full pirate conversion: words, money, dates, times, numbers, and context-aware interjections
// ==UserScript==
// @name ZedCity Pirate Immersion Mega Ultimate v6
// @namespace http://zed.city/
// @version 6.0
// @description Full pirate conversion: words, money, dates, times, numbers, and context-aware interjections
// @match *://*.zed.city/*
// @grant none
// ==/UserScript==
(function() {
'use strict';
// --- Word Translations ---
const TRANSLATIONS = [
["\\bhello\\b", "ahoy"],
["\\bhi\\b", "ahoy"],
["\\bhey\\b", "ahoy"],
["\\bmy\\b", "me"],
["\\byour\\b", "yer"],
["\\byou\\b", "ye"],
["\\bfriend\\b", "matey"],
["\\bfriends\\b", "crew"],
["\\bman\\b", "buccaneer"],
["\\bwoman\\b", "wench"],
["\\bboss\\b", "cap'n"],
["\\bmoney\\b", "booty"],
["\\bgold\\b", "booty"],
["\\btown\\b", "port"],
["\\bthe\\b", "th'"],
["\\bis\\b", "be"],
["\\bare\\b", "be"],
["\\bam\\b", "be"],
["\\bof\\b", "o'"],
["\\bfor\\b", "fer"],
["\\bto\\b", "t'"],
["\\bthis\\b", "this 'ere"],
["\\bthat\\b", "that 'ere"],
["\\bno\\b", "nay"],
["\\byes\\b", "aye"],
["\\bdrink\\b", "grog"],
["\\bdrinks\\b", "grog"],
["\\bsea\\b", "briny deep"],
["\\bfood\\b", "grub"],
["\\border\\b", "summon"],
["\\bkill\\b", "keelhaul"],
["\\bplease\\b", "be so kind, matey"],
["\\bking\\b", "pirate king"],
["\\bqueen\\b", "sea queen"],
["\\bcaptain\\b", "cap'n"],
["\\bfight\\b", "duel"],
["\\btreasure\\b", "booty"],
["\\bwork\\b", "plunder"],
["\\bsailor\\b", "sea dog"],
["\\bship\\b", "galleon"],
["\\bhome\\b", "harbor"]
];
// --- Days & Months ---
const PIRATE_DAYS = {
"Monday": "Moonday",
"Tuesday": "Twosday",
"Wednesday": "Wodensday",
"Thursday": "Thorsday",
"Friday": "Fryday",
"Saturday": "Sat’rday",
"Sunday": "Sun’s Day"
};
const PIRATE_MONTHS = {
"January": "JanuARRy",
"February": "FebruARRy",
"March": "Marrrch",
"April": "ApRRil",
"May": "May",
"June": "June",
"July": "July",
"August": "AugARRst",
"September": "SeptembARR",
"October": "OctobARR",
"November": "NovembARR",
"December": "DecembARR"
};
const PIRATE_TIMES = [
[/\bAM\b/g, "bells before noon"],
[/\bPM\b/g, "bells after noon"],
[/\bmidnight\b/gi, "the witchin’ hour"],
[/\bnoon\b/gi, "high sun"],
[/\byesterday\b/gi, "yestermorn"],
[/\btomorrow\b/gi, "on the morrow"],
[/\b(\d+)\s+hours?\b/gi, "$1 bells"],
[/\b(\d+)\s+minutes?\b/gi, "$1 minutes"],
[/\b(\d+)\s+seconds?\b/gi, "$1 heartbeats"],
[/\b(\d+)\s+days?\b/gi, "$1 suns"],
[/\bago\b/gi, "aft"]
];
// --- Compile Regex ---
const compiled = TRANSLATIONS.map(([pat, repl]) => ({
re: new RegExp(pat, "gi"),
repl
}));
// --- Case Preservation ---
function preserveCaseReplace(original, replacement) {
if (original === original.toUpperCase()) return replacement.toUpperCase();
if (original[0] === original[0].toUpperCase()) {
return replacement.charAt(0).toUpperCase() + replacement.slice(1);
}
return replacement;
}
// --- Money, Dates, Times ---
function pirateNumbersAndMoney(str) {
str = str.replace(/([$£€¥]\s?\d[\d,]*(\.\d+)?)/g, (match) => {
return match.replace(/[$£€¥]/, "").trim() + " pieces o’ eight";
});
str = str.replace(/\bUSD\s?(\d[\d,]*)/gi, "$1 pieces o’ eight");
for (let day in PIRATE_DAYS) str = str.replace(new RegExp("\\b" + day + "\\b", "g"), PIRATE_DAYS[day]);
for (let month in PIRATE_MONTHS) str = str.replace(new RegExp("\\b" + month + "\\b", "g"), PIRATE_MONTHS[month]);
str = str.replace(/\b(\d{4})\b/g, "Year o’ our Lord $1");
PIRATE_TIMES.forEach(([re, repl]) => str = str.replace(re, repl));
return str;
}
// --- Nautical Conversions ---
function pirateMeasurements(str) {
// Distances
str = str.replace(/(\d+\.?\d*)\s?m\b/g, (_, n) => ((parseFloat(n)/1.8288).toFixed(1) + " fathoms"));
str = str.replace(/(\d+\.?\d*)\s?km\b/g, (_, n) => ((parseFloat(n)/1.852).toFixed(1) + " nautical miles"));
// Weights
str = str.replace(/(\d+\.?\d*)\s?kg\b/g, (_, n) => ((parseFloat(n)/159).toFixed(1) + " barrels"));
str = str.replace(/(\d+\.?\d*)\s?t\b/g, (_, n) => (n + " burdens"));
// Speeds
str = str.replace(/(\d+\.?\d*)\s?m\/s\b/g, (_, n) => ((parseFloat(n)*1.944).toFixed(1) + " knots"));
return str;
}
// --- Context-Aware Pirate Interjections ---
function getContextAwareInterjection(str) {
const moneyKeywords = /\b(booty|gold|money|treasure|coins|pieces o’ eight)\b/i;
const timeKeywords = /\b(hour|time|minute|second|bell|day|morning|noon|midnight|tide)\b/i;
const dangerKeywords = /\b(danger|fight|battle|attack|kill|enemy|cannon|keelhaul)\b/i;
if (moneyKeywords.test(str)) {
return ["Booty ahoy!", "Pieces o’ eight!", "Gold in me eyes!", "Plunder time!", "Riches for all!"][Math.floor(Math.random()*5)];
} else if (timeKeywords.test(str)) {
return ["Mark the bell!", "Batten down the hatches!", "High noon approaches!", "The tide waits for no one!", "Heave ho!"][Math.floor(Math.random()*5)];
} else if (dangerKeywords.test(str)) {
return ["Fire the cannons!", "To Davy Jones’ locker!", "Scurvy dogs ahead!", "Ready the cutlasses!", "Brace yerselves!"][Math.floor(Math.random()*5)];
} else {
return ["Arr!", "Yo-ho-ho!", "Shiver me timbers!", "Avast!", "Blimey!", "By Blackbeard's beard!", "Land ho!", "Splice the mainbrace!"][Math.floor(Math.random()*8)];
}
}
// --- Full Translation ---
function translateString(str) {
let result = str;
compiled.forEach(({ re, repl }) => result = result.replace(re, (m) => preserveCaseReplace(m, repl)));
result = pirateNumbersAndMoney(result);
result = pirateMeasurements(result);
if (Math.random() < 0.10) result += " " + getContextAwareInterjection(result);
return result;
}
// --- Node Translators ---
function translateTextNode(node) {
if (node.nodeType === Node.TEXT_NODE && node.nodeValue.trim()) node.nodeValue = translateString(node.nodeValue);
}
function translateElementAttributes(el) {
["title", "alt", "placeholder", "aria-label"].forEach(attr => {
if (el.hasAttribute && el.hasAttribute(attr)) {
const val = el.getAttribute(attr);
if (val && val.trim()) el.setAttribute(attr, translateString(val));
}
});
if ((el.tagName === "INPUT" || el.tagName === "TEXTAREA") && el.type !== "password") {
if (el.value && el.value.trim() && !el.matches(":focus")) el.value = translateString(el.value);
}
}
function walkAndTranslate(root) {
const walker = document.createTreeWalker(
root,
NodeFilter.SHOW_TEXT,
{
acceptNode: (node) => {
if (!node.parentNode) return NodeFilter.FILTER_REJECT;
const style = window.getComputedStyle(node.parentNode);
if (style && style.display !== "none" && style.visibility !== "hidden") return NodeFilter.FILTER_ACCEPT;
return NodeFilter.FILTER_REJECT;
}
},
false
);
let node;
while ((node = walker.nextNode())) translateTextNode(node);
root.querySelectorAll("*").forEach(translateElementAttributes);
}
// --- Initial Translation ---
translateElementAttributes(document.body);
walkAndTranslate(document.body);
// --- Observe for Dynamic Content ---
const observer = new MutationObserver(mutations => {
mutations.forEach(m => {
if (m.addedNodes) m.addedNodes.forEach(n => {
if (n.nodeType === Node.ELEMENT_NODE) {
translateElementAttributes(n);
walkAndTranslate(n);
} else if (n.nodeType === Node.TEXT_NODE) {
translateTextNode(n);
}
});
});
});
observer.observe(document.body, { childList: true, subtree: true });
})();